I do my best at everything I do. I am not lazy, and I work hard to do my best at everything that I am given to do as a person, friend, family member, and as an employee. The last couple of weeks has been really difficult at work. This week topped the cake. On Monday I was assigned a project that was due by Wednesday morning. I was not given the appropriate tools to complete the task, and I knew because of difficulty with the dexterity in my hands that the task, although not difficult, would be time-consuming for me and that I would need more time or assistance to complete the task. When my supervisor emailed me to tell me about the change in the project and the new deadline I immediately responded saying that I would do the best I could but that I may have difficulty. Well, my supervisor came out of her office like a ball of fire and said to me out in the open, “If you can’t do this then I will just do it. I’m not telling A that this can’t be done.”
Needless to say, I was humiliated and was not given the opportunity to explain why I would have difficulty with the task or given a chance to offer suggestions on how the situation could be handled. I attempted to do the project in the time constraints but needed help, got visibly overwhelmed (I should have controlled my emotions better and kept a professional demeanor; I admit that.), and missed the deadline by an hour and a half. That lead to a meeting between my supervisor and the CFO.
During the meeting, they did tell me that I should have handled myself with more professionalism. I will give them that. As a matter of fact, I have already spoken with a friend of mine who is a long time HR professional and asked about ways to hide my emotions better while working; even when I am overwhelmed. I was given some really awesome tips.
- Deep Breathe
- Tell one of your co-worker’s you trust that you need to step away from your desk, go to the restroom, breathe, throw cold water on your face and come out composed.
- Hold it together until you get home (funny thing, so many people have said; don’t take work home with you…)
During the same meeting, they both spoke to me like I was incapable because I had difficulty with that particular project. The CFO even went on to say that I thought too much of myself and my capabilities. It was all said with a beautiful smile on their face. The signal to me was that they don’t value the other work I have put in, and I need to get out of here. I love many of my co-workers, but the top executives are clueless on the impact of their words and actions on their employees. I am not the only one here who has felt this way. So, I did two things today:
One, I gave my supervisor, the CFO and the “Interim” HR director a written letter stating the limitations because of my disability and a list of suggested accommodations (with medical documentation) asking them to engage in the interactive accommodation process. This happened to make it all official and “On paper.” I have discussed my accommodations with them all on multiple occasions, and they have all said things were fine. But, when I tried to engage in a conversation about the difficulty I would have in completing I was shut down and then insulted when the project was not down in their time constraints. Two started looking for better jobs and fixing my resume.